Well I did something that was helpful to teach me what I would be like on a date..... I hung out with HB#2 from work. I hung out at the mall and then went to one of her friends houses to watch a movie that was by far the most scarring movie you will ever see. It will haunt you forever and that's no lie. Well anyways, I hung out with her and we talked for like 2 hours. Well I realized some things with her.. Like for one that I am not attracted to her and two that she isn't into me, but she does like me as a friend, and I couldn't have it any other way with her.. I am happy with that too. I enjoy just having a friend that I can be friends with that is female, she's not a girlfriend, but just a friend. I have never had that before and hanging out with her tonight made me realize that. We hung out not treating it as a date, she probably assumed I thought it was because I was dressed real good and her not so much, but nonetheless we hung out, just hung out. I realized what I am like on a date, if that was a date which it could have been if we had a chemistry. My C&F is lacking, I could not get good rapport with her. We just talked a lot, but I never made her really laugh or kino with me, but I did make her smile. I wasn't too much of a wuss as usual, so that made me happy. I was different then at work with her but we still had a good time. After the movie neither her or I wanted to talk much cause we had the movie still on our heads, but before I could say anything about it she said that she wanted to do it again. I didn't think that a kiss was appropriate, but I am not sure if I would have known that if she had even given me the signs. I don't know when to spontaneously kiss her or any other girl, I do know the kiss test, but I never know when to even consider giving her the tests. Our rapport wasn't that great and in the "movie theatre" she wasn't leaning in to me, she was exactly the opposite. Now, I wasn't treating this as a date, but as a way to see how I see myself in dates could become without you guy's help. I wasn't being the alpha male or C&F/cool/fun guy, and I did notice myself at times leaning in and tried leaning back more. I think in the end I was just plain happy to get out of the house and didn't care how. Her friends I met watching the movie were nice and helped make the experience of the night a good one.

This isn't a field report, but I can't stress enough how much I am happy to know that I am now going out places instead of my bedroom and also I was able to get an idea of what a real date would be like and how it would end up without your help. Now obviously, with you help I would like at least a makeout session in the end of the first date, but for now I am able to observe all of these things about me and I couldn't be happier. Once again I noticed how I got kinda serious, or at least more serious then usual with her. I didn't try any kino with her and she didn't with me either. I just feel more uptight on dates (the two only, not really dates, so far), but it's hard to describe... Well that was all I wanted to say.. My last blog was really emotionally connective to who I am and why I am that way, and also my questionable method how I rate a girl. If you haven't read it, you really need to check that out! It's my pride and joy so far and I cannot wait to make more of those blogs that I am really into.